Mark milestones with a ceremony (8/8/05)

We may not be the Red Hat Ladies but we are just as rowdy. I wanted a ceremony to mark a new chapter in my life. I couldn’t find a ritual appropriate to the occasion so, ever resourceful, I made up one.

I found a roll of yellow ribbon that was left over from tagging the cages around my new pussy willows. The only scissors I could find was a tiny pair that came with the grow-your-own-bonsai kit my daughter had gotten me for my birthday several months ago. Although the bonsai seeds grew they flopped over a week after the ice storm, never to rise again.

Every celebration needs bubbles. I had a tiny bottle of bubble solution left over from our niece’s wedding. I don’t think any of the other celebrants noticed that the bottle said “Jane and Penny.”

I intended this to be a secular occasion, much like a birthday, and scouted around for something else to make the ceremony complete. When I found a purple fan with red feathers in a store aisle catering to the Red Hat Ladies I knew it was perfect.

I scoured the internet looking for suggestions. Most of what I found involved unorthodox religions and to my surprise there are a lot of cults devoted to Diana, goddess of the hunt, moon, childbirth and other unrelated stuff. I thought Diana cults died out centuries ago. Haven’t these people heard of mythology? As in mythological, folklore and just plain not real? These people are downright scary. Thank goodness I don’t actually know any of them.

I took bits and pieces from what I found and put together an outline of a ceremony. Then we went to lunch. I promptly forgot most of what I meant to say. You’d think I would have enough sense to write these things on paper.

After downing a plateful of Mexican food we began the ceremony which started by having two of the women spill salsa on themselves. This was unintentional but it set the mood for the ensuing festivities.

We formed a circle with the ribbon and all held on to it. This was to symbolize the circle of life and that we were all connected. Then I cut the circle to show that even though we are all connected we are also individuals. That part came from watching too many Star Trek Voyager reruns. At this point some guy paying for his food kept staring at us so I called him over. We explained what we were doing and he escaped as quickly as he could. God only knows what he told his coworkers when he got back to work. It was probably something about crazy women at the Mexican restaurant. He’s lucky. I considered having us give him a group hug.

Then we each took the ceremonial fan and told what this period of our lives meant to us. Keep in mind that this fan has bright red feathers. The bottle of bubbles was next. We each decided on one thing to give up and we blew it away with the bubbles. One lady gave up a cheating ex-boyfriend. Her bubbles landed in her iced tea so I hope that doesn’t mean she gets him back. It could mean that he is all wet. The next lady couldn’t get the bubbles to blow and we all got the giggles watching her.

The ceremony was finally complete and we were preparing to end it by making up words to the Spanish-language soap operas on television when the Mayor and the head of the street department came over to see what all the laughing was about. There is nothing like having city officials crash a ceremony. They liked the fan. I think it was something about the feathers that attracted them. Thankfully they didn’t have us arrested for creating a ruckus in public.

The whole point of this long drawn out tale is that you make your own choices in life. If there isn’t a ritual appropriate for what you want then it is perfectly acceptable to create one. If there is no path leading to where you want to go then it’s OK to make your own. It’s your life. You and only you determine how it will be lived.

Oh, and if you see a bunch of laughing ladies holding onto a yellow ribbon feel free to join us. We’re just celebrating life.[[In-content Ad]]