Tonight is a night for ghosts, werewolves and goblins (10/31/05)

Lions, and tigers and bears, oh my. Ghosts, werewolves and goblins, oh dear. Tonight they will be roaming the streets and knocking on doors. That ultimate symbol of the dark side, Darth Vader, will put in an appearance while his mother hovers just out of sight. Funny, I didn’t realize Darth was so short. He seemed much taller on the big screen.

Today is the day we pay tribute to the dead, to various mythological creatures and to the marketing skill of Hollywood. Fundamentalist Christians will bemoan the pagan history of the holiday and wring their hands over supposed devil-worship.

Personally I believe the only thing worshiped by most people on Halloween is candy. Besides, if you really try you can associate every holiday there is with some sort of pagan rite.

Like most rituals, Halloween is a meld of ancient traditions and beliefs with modern morés. It is the perfect time for children of all ages to pretend to be whatever they want to be. Little kids can be super-heros who save the world from destruction or they can be cuddly Care Bears that everybody loves.

Grown-ups will indulge the whims of their progeny by allowing them to wear make-up, fake fingernails and colorful wigs. They even allow their children to play at whacking each other with plastic swords or at least they will until somebody starts crying. Parents will distribute enough candy and other sweet treats to put the witch in Hansel and Gretel to shame. A candy-covered cottage is nothing compared to a pillowcase full of gummy worms and chocolate bars.

Speaking of candy, have you noticed that the sweet treats are getting more and more disgusting? This may be a way for the children to keep the loot for themselves. While a parent may filch a peanut butter cup, most will leave the gummy brains and chocolate eyeballs for the beggars who collected them. Perhaps the confectioneries are trying to turn us into a nation of cannibals. How else do you explain the proliferation of edible body parts and recipes for making witches’ fingers out of bread dough and almonds?

No matter how many recipies you read, I hope you don’t bother making popcorn balls to give away on Halloween. I don’t know of any parent who will allow their child to take the first bite out of a homemade treat of any kind. So all that work will be for nothing. If you must make popcorn balls them keep them for yourself.

That goes for apples also. The persistent rumors about needles and razor blades in apples have done away with the pleasure of receiving a rosy red apple to balance out the other treats. I remember when I went trick-or-treating as a child. There was always an old couple who gave out apples. Granted, the apples were tiny and often blemished but it was obvious that the couple derived great pleasure from giving these away. I always felt bad about not being able to eat them. The apples, not the people! Good grief!

There is something about us that likes to be scared while remaining perfectly safe. Being out after dark and roaming around with a gang of assorted monsters holds a certain thrill for little ones who are usually banished indoors after the sun goes down. When we get bigger we gravitate towards scary stories like The Tell-Tale Heart by Poe or anything written by that current master of suspense, Stephen King. We make up ghost stories and claim the White House is visited by the spirits of dead presidents.

Corn mazes that allow us to get lost safely and haunted houses abound this time of year. Halloween is a time when we can have a bit of fun before settling down for the long cold winter ahead. But the very best thing about Halloween night is that I will no longer have to listen to anyone complaining about the Christmas decorations being out already. Wait — that is the second best thing. The best thing is all the left over candy just waiting to be devoured.[[In-content Ad]]