What's a perfect 'in-between' gift?

I’ve been married to my husband for almost half my life. Wow. Sometimes it seems longer and sometimes it seems like yesterday that we were standing in the church with our families around us. We were giddy with excitement and secretly wondering if we were doing the right thing.

I looked on the internet for suggestions as to what to get my husband for our anniversary this year. Apparently, presents aren’t required for any anniversary between the 25th and 30th and most places I looked had no suggestions at all for this momentous occasion. I finally found one site that said that “original pictures” were appropriate but it didn’t say pictures of what.

I don’t know who comes up with the list of presents that are supposed to be given for these celebrations. The chart compiled by the librarians at the Chicago Public Library seems to match most of the other lists I have found and is more extensive as it has something for every year of marriage from the first tumultuous year clear through to the 100th year of marriage.

They have some interesting options. For instance for the fifth anniversary the traditional gift is wood and the modern choice is silverware. I don’t know about you but the last thing I want for an anniversary is a 2x4 or silverware. Five years of marriage isn’t nearly enough time to lose half the spoons to children digging in the flower bed. Five years of dropping forks down the garbage disposer still leaves enough to use for dinner if one straightens the tines a little.

The seventh anniversary traditional present is wool or copper and the modern version is a desk set. These aren’t appealing to me. Wool is scratchy unless it is still on the sheep. I do have a very nice copper necklace my husband gave me before we got married. He gave me a copper bracelet to go with it but it makes my wrist hurt. I know copper bracelets have a reputation as having magical healing powers but I find it to be uncomfortable. And as for a desk set, there isn’t room on my desk for a set of anything.

The 14th anniversary used to be ivory but we decimated the elephants in search of this beautiful material so now the option is gold jewelry. This makes the jewelers happy. The elephants are happy, too, except for their ever-increasing worry about humans encroaching on their land. They aren’t exactly pleased about poachers either, but that is another story.

Thank goodness we didn’t see this compilation a couple of years ago on our 24th anniversary. There is no gift listed for the traditional side but the modern option is, of all things, musical instruments! After 24 years of marriage I’m expected to give him a piano or a piccolo? I would think that if he wanted a musical instrument he would have bought one for himself years ago.

I am looking forward to the 28th anniversary. I can handle getting orchids. I hope that means plants and not just blossoms. I have yet to master the art of getting them to rebloom but hope springs eternal.

The 32nd anniversary is supposed to bring “conveyances (e.g. automobiles)” if one is following the modern tradition. I don’t know about you but in my life a car is a major purchase that should be decided by both parties unless the manufacturer is Mattel.

Forty-two years of wedded bliss nets a purchase of improved real estate. Again, who buys these things as presents? The 43rd year is for travel. That could be interesting. But then the 44th anniversary suggestion is groceries. I presume this is because one is broke from buying real estate, not to mention travel expenses.

If by chance you make it to your 100th anniversary one or maybe both of you get a 10-carat diamond. If you manage to put up with each other for that long you would deserve anything you got.

I don’t think we will follow any of the traditional or modern gift suggestions. Instead we will do what we usually do on our anniversary. We will go out for a delicious dinner, have some intelligent conversation and promise to keep on sharing our lives with each other for another year.

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