Stop waiting on the universe

“It will be better when “ … this or that happens. I have heard that phrase my entire life and I have come to realize that it is usually false.

For years and years I heard my mom say that when she gets her new house life will be perfect. When she finally did get her new house she found that it was farther away from her friends than she had assumed it would be. There was no public transportation other than a senior citizens van that required her to make appointments a week or so ahead of time. As often as not the van was already booked for the time she wanted it.

Her parents and two of her three brothers had passed away. Her children had their own lives and weren’t available as often as she would have liked. She wasn’t close to her cousins or any of her aunts and uncles.

At first she went to the local senior citizens center for lunches and crafts. She made friends with some of the people there. Whenever any of us took her to lunch or shopping she always found someone she knew. There were also a couple of women who called her on a regular basis. She delighted in talking to them but it wasn’t the same as having someone her own age to go shopping with.

As the years passed by it became more and more difficult for her to get onto the senior citizens van and she finally decided it wasn’t worth the pain of trying to manage the steps.

Meals on Wheels or a similar agency brought meals to her house. She complained when they brought chicken. She never could understand why they couldn’t bring her a hamburger on the days chicken was on the menu.

Her health deteriorated over the years. She became more and more isolated. Having a new house did not make her life perfect.

Many of us think if we could lose a few pounds then life would be perfect. We will be able to find clothes that fit. We will feel more energetic and be healthier. Sometimes that is true. As often as not we aren’t any happier than we were before. Then we not only gain back the weight we lost but a few extra pounds come along for the ride.

We apply this concept to politics as in life would be better if only our chosen candidate is elected. Both sides believe this. They will defend their position as best they can. All the rhetoric, the exaggerations, the misleading information and downright lies rarely change anyone’s opinion. It simply doesn’t work that way.

The truth is that life unfolds as it should no matter what we wish for. Thinking about the many ways we wish life could be better is fruitless. When my mom wished for a new house, she had not considered all the other challenges life had in mind. The new house she wished for was not the answer to her prayers. Life in the new house was better in many ways. It was warm, she had a modern washer and dryer instead of a wringer washer and a clothes line. None of the usual amenities helped with the overall pains and isolation that age often brings.

What I am trying to say is that wishing for that one thing to happen that will make everything perfect is useless. It is far better to do whatever makes you happy and quit waiting on the universe to do whatever it is you want it to do.