Slugs invade columnist’s backyard

I probably should save this column for October as it has a definite ick factor.

We got home from a free concert late Saturday evening. Most of the audience was what I refer to as old hippies. Grey and white were the predominant hair colors. Good music and pleasant weather made it an enjoyable evening.

There were a couple of people who got up to dance to the music. The most entertaining one was the kid who looked to be in his very early teens. His long black hair swished from side to side as he and a friend danced.

The other dancers were almost all children. The littlest appeared to be about a year old and tried numerous times to escape from the adults who ran after her.

When we got home we discovered creatures climbing the outside of the house. It wasn’t Spider-Man. Two of the three were intertwined. The other one tried to blend in with the siding on the house. As it was brown and the house is white, it didn’t work.

They were slugs. Icky, slimy slugs. And the two intertwined ones? They were engaging in some outdoor hanky panky. Right out there in front of God and everybody.

My normal response to those creatures is to grab the salt shaker and apply a generous coat of salt on them. It seemed cruel to do that when they were in each other’s embrace. So I gave them a reprieve until the next day.

Thankfully they had sense enough to disappear. I have always been told that I should sprinkle diatomaceous earth around plants to deter slugs. Diatomaceous earth is made from diatoms. What is a diatom? They are teensy critters that are surprisingly beautiful.

I once took a class called “Plants and their allies.” Normal people would think that has something to do with which plants grow well with others or maybe how to keep bunnies from nibbling on exotic plants.

Nope. We spent the entire time studying algae. Yeah, that slimy green stuff that makes you scrub the birdbath more often than you would like. We also spent a couple of days talking about diatoms. Then when the instructor showed pictures of the creatures we found out that they were beautiful. As an aside, we were advised that sprinkling diatomaceous earth around hostas  would discourage slugs. So much for plants and their allies.

If you visit the local aisle of death at any store that sells pesticides and such, there are many products advertising a solution that will deter slugs and other creatures. I prefer not to use those products because any product that ends with the letters c-i-d-e is designed to kill. You are more than welcome to apply them to your own plants, just not to mine.

Apparently slugs also like beer as there are several slug traps that use beer to attract the slippery critters. Neither of us drink and I have no intention of buying beer for garden pests.

Slugs have some natural enemies other than women with salt shakers. Lightning bugs, toads, birds and even chipmunks find them to be tasty treats.

I am hoping that the appearance of the house-climbing slugs was an anomaly and not an omen of things to come.