September 24, 2024 at 12:00 a.m.

Single parents need more credit

Parental Ponderings

By Chris Schanz

I have a tremendous amount of respect for single parents.

A couple months ago, I wrote a column about how Chrissy and I took Baby Schanz on our first family adventure, a drive down to see friends in Spencerville, Ohio.

There was only one minor hiccup, but overall the trip went well.

I wish I could say the same for when we had our first Daddy/Daughter adventure earlier this month.

Aubree, a friend from my days in Indiana who in recent years moved back to her home state of Washington, was back in the Midwest for a wedding. Knowing she’d be relatively close for the first time in a while, we wanted to try to get together for a number of reasons. First, we hadn’t seen each other since my own wedding in 2019, and I wanted her to meet my daughter.

Aubree was going to be in the Syracuse, Indiana, area for the wedding, and we decided to meet in the middle, near Lansing, Michigan.

There was one caveat, though. My in-laws were in our area camping so they, too, could see their granddaughter. Therefore, I’d have to pluck Baby Schanz from their visitation in order to take her to meet Aubree.

No one had an issue, thankfully.

The Sunday after the wedding Aubree attended, we decided on a coffee shop in Marshall, Michigan, which is a little further for me than we originally planned and more in the middle for both of our commutes.

Chrissy and I made sure I had everything I needed to care for Baby Schanz: a few frozen bags of breastmilk and accompanying bottles, diapers and wipes, spare clothes in the event of spit-ups or blowouts, a pacifier, toys and a host of other things “just in case” because I tend to overpack for myself, let alone an infant.

I am a firm believer it’s better to have and not need than need and not have. Hence my overpacking.

I’ve said before that Baby Schanz loves riding in vehicles. She generally falls asleep rather quickly, so car rides generally go without a hitch.

This was true as we drove the two hours to Marshall; she slept the entire way.

Not long after Aubree and I met at the coffee shop, Baby Schanz needed to eat. In past experiences, Chrissy and I had just used bathroom sinks to warm the milk, but in this instance time was of the essence because my daughter gets hangry without any notice.

The wonderful barista behind the counter gave me some hot water to thaw the milk and avoid the disaster of a baby crying hysterically.

After my much-needed visit with Aubree, it was late afternoon and time to head home. Baby Schanz was starting to get a bit cranky, so I changed her diaper in an attempt to alleviate her uneasiness. I was taking a gamble by not feeding her before we left. On one hand, it had only been about two hours since her last bottle (we generally feed her every three hours), and on the other hand, if I waited to feed her when I got home, she’d be at four-plus hours between meals.

The first hour of the drive home was like the excursion there; quiet and carefree. The second hour is why I am writing this column.

Baby Schanz has ditched her hunger cues. She goes from zero to 100 in the blink of an eye. Such was the case shortly at the midway point of our drive home.

I won’t bore you with the details, but it was a frustrating final leg. It seemed no matter what I did, I couldn’t calm my daughter. I was desperately in need of a reprieve and Chrissy was an hour away.

Single parents, especially single mothers, do not get enough credit. Parenting alone is no easy task. Millions of single mothers and single fathers raise a child, or children, on their own.

Admittedly, this was one of a few times Baby Schanz has tested my patience in her short six months of life. I’ve always gotten through it with some help from my partner.

Others may not be as fortunate as me, and I’m thankful to have a spouse to help.

Taking a line from the Lazlo Bane song used as the theme for my favorite TV show, Scrubs: “I can’t do this all on my own / No, I’m no / I’m no Superman.”

Single parents, they’re the real superheroes.

••••••••••

Chris Schanz is a former CR Sports Editor embarking on a new journey as a father. You can reach him at [email protected].


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