Spring just can’t come soon enough

Questions pile up in February, not unlike those ugly piles of snow and ice at the edges of the parking lot.

Questions like:

•Does America really need another football league? After sampling the Alliance of American Football and witnessing an exchange of field goals, I found myself far more satisfied by Premier League soccer (aka football to the rest of the world).

•How do you shake a cold when temperatures fluctuate 50 or 60 degrees in the course of a couple days?

•Who hasn’t indulged in the pleasure of gloating over chilly temperatures in Florida when we’re freezing our rear ends off in the Midwest? Sure, it’s still much colder here; but there’s a certain amount of satisfaction in knowing that some of the misery is shared.

•What is Jay County’s iconic piece of architecture? That’s a question the Fort Wayne area has been dealing with recently. Their favorite was the Lincoln Tower, which makes sense. But what is ours? The bowstring truss arch bridge over the Salamonie in Portland? The courthouse? The Andersons grain terminal? The Weiler Building? The last surviving round barns? You have to admit it’s an interesting question.

•Don’t you want to give a piece of your mind to the inventor of the plastic shopping bag? It’s the most prevalent piece of litter on the landscape and the hardest to get rid of.

•Which would you rather do right now, shovel snow or mow the lawn?

•Why is it that CDs somehow become separated from their plastic cases? And why is it so hard to reunite them?

•When was the last time you offered a ride to a pedestrian on a cold and nasty day? Did you feel guilty when you drove by?

•If you had visitors coming from out of state — let’s say a couple of grandsons from Boston, theoretically of course — what three to five local attractions would you want them to see and experience? Just asking, of course.

•Did your Valentine’s Day live up to expectations? Did it add up to your sweetie’s expectations?

•Does anyone really care — I mean, really care — about the NBA?

•When you’re on a diet and Girl Scout Cookie season arrives, which one wins?

•Isn’t there something comforting and special about watching an old movie on TV that you’ve seen a dozen times when you’re watching it with someone you love, especially if you saw it the first time together?

•Does anyone have an accurate count on how many times “Flea Market Flip” has been aired this month?

•And, to follow up, doesn’t the stupidity of shoppers in New York City give you a little boost of superiority when they buy those ridiculous mash-ups?

•Who is your favorite president when Presidents’ Day rolls around? Washington? Lincoln? Millard Fillmore?

•Don’t you feel old every time you hear a cultural reference to a celebrity or a movie or a TV show or a song that you have absolutely never heard of? Is there any way to avoid that?

•Aren’t you looking forward to spring? Can it come soon enough?