Pets earn new nicknames

If you have pet dogs, it's a pretty safe bet, at one point or another, you'll conjure up little “pet" names in addition to their actual “government taxpaying job” name.

Eleven years ago in January, one of our grandsons was gifted a Corgi-Sheltie from a neighbor kid who he was quite close with. They both got “mutts” out of the litter.

I made the mistake of calling them mutts, due to their mixed breed bloodline lineage.

Boy, was I ever wrong. I was quickly informed that our dog was not a mutt, but a “boutique breed” that was indeed worth hundreds as pups.

Who knew? Certainly not me.

Over the years, Chip (our grandson named him Chip), really has endeared himself to us and all who know him.

He's picked up several “pet” names over the years — Chipster, Der Widdle Chipster, Buddy Boy, My Widdle Buddy, etc. You know the drill.

Unfortunately, last winter, right as the Chinese New Year came in — this year as The Year Of The Dragon — our Widdle Chipster developed a partial hip dysplasia/paralysis.

So, of course, after several diagnostics, he's picked up a new name — My Chinese Year Of The Draggin’ Paw.

He's in perfect health otherwise, but has lost control of one rear paw almost completely, and the other rear paw, partially.

On occasion, he still likes to play the bully alpha male to the resident cats around here.

Now, recall there's the whole Year Of The Draggin’ Paw thing going on.

He was out in the yard, Draggin’ Paw, as usual. He fussed at one of our cats and a tiger gray stray that's been hustling us for free grub and grog.

Well, the tiger gray had enough of his aggression and whacked him on the nose with full all-wheel drive claw mode engaged.

He took off running with a bloody nose. It was the funniest thing I think I've seen in a long time.

The one Draggin’ Paw generally has about 10% use and the other maybe 30%. In full raw terror mode with a nose full of Tiger Cat Paw and Claw in all-wheel drive mode, the 30% Draggin’ Paw was about 95%, and the 10% Draggin’ Paw was transformed into an Olympic style “Boys In The Boat” rowing oar.

So he's darting across the yard at a breakneck pace with two front paws clawing at the ground, one rear Draggin’ Paw and one Oar Leg rowing for his terror stricken life.

It was rolling-on-the-floor funny.

He was certainly motivated by that stray, homeless, beggar cat.

In a future update, we will address trying to fit a stubborn Draggin’ Paw with wheels.

Hint, it isn't going well.